First, I make sure she’s in a safe place, that her medical needs are met, that she’s not hungry . . . I make sure her basic needs are met.
Then, I encourage her to set an appointment to meet with me. We talk through her options — what she feels is best for her baby, because at Colorado Christian Services she gets to make all the decisions. It’s our job to just walk alongside her as she is making the most difficult decisions she will ever have to make.
If parenting is her choice, we can help her build that infrastructure so she can be the best parent that she can be. We have great relationships with various community organizations that can help her be successful.
But if she’s thinking adoption is the best thing for her, then we talk about what she is hoping for in an adoptive family. Does she envision a big family? Does she want her child to be the first child in the family? It seems God always provides the right family.
I take time to see if she feels confident, comfortable, and ready to move forward. We then start the process of selecting an adoptive family by having her look through our materials featuring parents wanting to adopt. From there, we’ll let her meet the family so that she can get more connected and feel comfortable.
Of course, all along the way, we make sure she knows that she’s absolutely able to change her mind. We will support her no matter what her decision is. And, no matter what, we continue the counseling process with her along the way.
Then we talk about the plans for delivery . . . what would she like to have happen in the hospital? Would she like the family to be there? Would she like to have her mom there for support? She decides it all.
The birth mom decides whether the baby will bunk in with the adoptive family while in the hospital or stay with her so they can have alone time before discharge. We let her guide the process and we advocate for her, come alongside her and support her as she’s making all these decisions.
It’s really wonderful how close relationships develop between the birth mom and the adoptive family. We advocate for openness. It is very important for everyone involved. You can never have too many people loving the child, right?
One thing is for sure — you’ve got to love people in order to be successful in this job and you need to understand the big picture. We have an incredibly important role as caseworkers; a lot of responsibility falls on our shoulders. We must think on our feet and put into action the training and supervision we’ve had.
We show our love for Jesus by loving our birth moms.